Learning to accept rejection


Vishwa Jani

Poet and writer

We all face rejection multiple times in our life. Rejection hurts every time, regardless of the situation. We let rejection impact our self-worth. We feel anxious, lonely and sometimes also jealous.

Rejection is normal in life, just like our daily meals. We face it daily in some form or the other. Yet, we let it hover over our mind and take complete hold of us. Any kind of rejection; whether it is love, career, friends or anything else, should not be something which affects our happiness.

We can build a positive outlook or a healthy attitude towards rejection. Here are some steps we can take for this purpose:

1) Accept the rejection

On facing rejection, we often deny it, or feel pity for ourselves or else even throw the rejection another way. Let’s not do that to ourselves. Instead, let us accept the rejection wholeheartedly. It is not important to analyse whether the rejection is justified or not immediately. For a start, let’s just accept it as a part of the experience. This will help us in growing.

We should give ourselves time to digest the rejection. We don’t need to force a smile on our face. It may hurt a bit. But with time we will have to get out of it. This is not a permanent verdict of life. It is a temporary setback at the most.

2) Learn from it.

Accepting the rejection doesn’t mean that we are slaves to it. We will have to shift the way we see things. Rather than making it our weakness, we can learn to gain motivation from it.

Something we can do is to make sure that it doesn’t happen again for the same mistake. We can even take it as a challenge to prove our worth in the next round.

See things from a positive light. It is the only way to instantly move forward with confidence.

3) Talk to a trusted person

A parent or a teacher or a friend. Talking with them will help us in understanding the situation better and coping up with it faster. They will guide us and also support during our grieving/recovery period, if any.

Above all, let’s remember one thing: Rejection doesn’t define us ! We should never label ourselves according to so-called rejections or failures. We need not let rejection stop us from pursuing our dreams and living our life.

Harvey Mackay : “Most fears of rejection rest on the desire for approval from other people. Don't base your self-esteem on their opinions.”

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