Flying when we fail


Neha Somani

Organizational & Counselling Psychologist

Today, let us take a pen and paper and make a list of times we failed when we tried to do something. We can do this task mentally too. But it is recommended that we get a pen and paper and actually write it down. We’ll take five to ten minutes and write down whatever events that come to our mind.

What did we write? A missed job promotion, a failed exam, a relationship that that went sour. Did any of us write, “I failed to ride a bicycle, “I failed to learn how to walk,” (when we tried to do it for the first time). We certainly need not undermine the gravity of our failures or the emotions they stirred when we first faced them. All that we need to understand is, sometimes, nothing really works right the first time. It is ok to falter, fail and fall down. But we all have a choice when life pushes us down…

Unfortunately, we have been conditioned since childhood that ‘failing’ is bad. Even if we ran a little race in school, our parents would want us to win that and excel in every little thing we did. This definitely came out of sheer love and goodness but became a part of our adulthood. We grew up running these races in school only to enter a bigger and wilder jungle called as the “Rat Race”. Winning is glory and failure will make you a loser and a zero. Time to change the rules. We fail… we pick a lesson and move on to the next goal. Imagine if we picked up something every time we failed how rich our life could become.

We don’t have to beat ourselves if we are unable to achieve something. Self-loathing and self-pitying will make us feel even worse. No matter what situation we are in, there will always be a way out. It is not the end of the world, even though it may seem so.

Let’s never forget that there is hope. We can think of it as a big pot of gold at the end of the tunnel. Walking down the long tunnel will be tiring and challenging but worth every bit of it.

So, let’s move forward and not let failure stop us from growing and learning. Only then can our dreams get wings.

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