Being emotionally independent


Alush Tembhekar


We all have been through relationships, some were serious, some were casual, but no matter what you call it, it HURTS when it ends. It’s difficult to cope up and move on, months pass by, sometimes even years.

One thing we all try or think of doing is to rebound or get closely attached to someone else of opposite sex, which comes naturally along. That person can be either a friend, colleague or even someone random from a dating app. They make us feel happy about ourselves, comfort us, keep us from drifting into those past memories.

Before the breakup we had a partner, to whom we could go and cry and share our joys and sorrows. But after the breakup, when that person is gone we are all alone, we latch onto the very next person we come across, leading to rebounding or casual dating. That's because we are afraid of being ALONE.

At times, we forget about the old relationship and move on with the current one, but we need to consider, have we really changed with respect to our behaviour with the new person or are we the same as we were back then (past relationship)??

Some people change for good & some don't, because they don't give enough time to self-evaluate their past behaviour and end up making the same mistake again. Even after ending one relationship or more, they keep wondering what went wrong and start to curse themselves, sinking deep into a sea of depression.

Under such circumstances being emotionally independent is of utmost importance.

Being emotionally independent means - the ability to manage your life and your stress levels, even under negative circumstances.

The simple fact is, that if you are emotionally independent, you don't need other person to feel good about yourself and be happy. You will get a sense of confidence and feel less anxious about the past, when you look in the mirror.

This is possible by:

• Gaining a better understanding of your values and long-term goals
• Paying more attention to yourself
• Taking full responsibility of your happiness and success
• Becoming aware of how you naturally respond to positive/negative aspects of life
• Taking steps towards changing your negative feelings (it will take time, but eventually you will get there)
• Knowing trust in yourself is more important than loving someone else

Summing it up all, ‘Give time for yourself, because if you don't start truly trusting & loving yourself, you can never truly trust & love someone else'.

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Discussion Board

What do you think should someone do after a breakup?

Rohit Chopra
One can try to spend some time alone and do the things that there was no time for earlier - a new hobby, a new gym routine or even a new look! Life moves forward and there is no reason to become sad thinking about what has gone 😇🙏
Omkar Patekar
Heartbreaks makes you wiser, what have I learner is that first we need to love yourself and you really don't need other person to make you happy or feel good .
After a breakup you first need to be with someone who loves you alot.. Family, friends, pet and then be with yourself. Give your mind and body time to adjust to not having a habit of being loved by that particular person. This practise will make your body atune to Newer surroundings and also make you believe in yourself and your happiness. Deleting pictures will only clear your phone's memory, not yours 💛
Muskaan Tatawat
After a breakup....where you got cheated like anything,tried sharing with few friends but of no use.idk what to do, ik i took right decision to break up but i can't forget phone memory is clear but nrain is sucha fucker.....i don't remember my kanjis but i remember those fucking things he said,time we spent together. Wow idk what to fo
Alush Tembhekar
All takes time and acceptance, thinking about the future rather than dwelling in the past memories.
Anurag Shastri
Any relation makes you too busy to know the self and in admist of that we tend to do many mistakes. The best thing that can be done after break up is self analysis and improvement which will help you know your flaws and grow even better.