HOW YOU CAN HEAL YOURSELF
Healing. It’s a simple word but it has a lot of meaning. Easy to talk about, but a little tough to execute. In some cases, healing from mental wounds may be even more difficult than physical wounds! So, if you choose to heal yourself mentally, then my friend, I am really very proud of you!
At times I thought that healing myself is impossible. I did not know how to come out of the dark. Everything looked like a black ocean. On some days, I thought: I won! I’m completely healed. The very next day, I felt like it’s impossible to heal. So it’s definitely not easy.
But today, I want to assure you that it is possible. You can heal yourself. Whenever something bad happens, we often think: ‘It’s because of me. I don’t deserve happiness.’ At such times, you need to remember that the problems you are facing today are building you to become the better version of yourself tomorrow.
Each person will have a unique way of self-healing. However, I’ve listed down some steps that will help along the way.
It is a tragedy that we never fully accept what happened to us. We blame either ourselves or someone else. Either we try to stop thinking about it or we overthink about it. We do everything, but we do not accept the situation as it is.
Acceptance is the key and you can't heal without completely accepting what happened. You may not be responsible for it, you may not have deserved what happened to you, but you need to accept the fact that it did happen. Acceptance is the first step to healing and there is no way to bypass this crucial step.
2. Talk to yourself
”Talk to yourself at least once in a day, otherwise you may miss a meeting with an excellent person in this world.” -Swami Vivekananda
Spend at least 20 minutes with yourself every day. If you don't talk to yourself, you will never understand what you really want. I have seen people confused and frustrated all the time. Sometimes that happens because we don’t understand what exactly we want and what exactly we don't want. We get so busy while chasing our career goals that we hardly talk to ourselves and this is lead to a gradual disconnect with the self.
3. Worry breaks
Healing is an ongoing process. Some people pretend they’ve moved on very easily from trauma and that's the BIG lie they're telling you and themselves: because suppressing your thoughts will hurt you even more in a long run.
It is quite impossible to completely remove worry from life. So why not schedule it? You heard me right!
I recommend that you schedule a fixed time to worry or think about a specific problem that you might be facing. Maybe 30 minutes every evening. During this time, you may think about your problems and maybe brood over your difficulties. But after that period ends, you must train yourself to leave your troubles behind and do something more productive and happy. This is something I learnt from Robin Sharma, the best-selling author.
4. Take a self-care day
How can we expect people to care for us when we only are not caring, valuing ourselves enough? Isn’t that impractical?
Plan one day in your week for your care. That day do anything you want. Take a break from social media and do whatever you feel like doing at that very moment. Maybe drawing, doodling, dancing, cooking, singing, writing a blog, reading a book! Anything!!!
Just make yourself feel special and care-free. That day of the week you may feel like doing nothing and that is completely okay.
5. Know your responsibilities
We always get confused about our feelings and it impacts directly on our sense of responsibility. Shree Krishna mentioned in the Bhagavad Gita that responsibility should be your utmost priority. In fact, the whole Mahabharata was based on the concept of duty over feelings.
During your journey, also remember that you may have some responsibilities. Maybe work, family, friends, etc. You will need to find a way to balance your time and resources in a way that you can fulfil your legitimate responsibilities.
6. Start living! You have one life
We get so busy complaining about everything and everyone that we get no time to appreciate life. Everything happens for a reason. So don't waste your energy and time thinking about the reasons of others’ behaviour.
Instead, focus on yourself and build yourself. What you have is only one life. Learn new things, be passionate, be curious, give yourself a new task every week and trust me after some period of time you will be more proud of yourself than you ever thought you would be.
“The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can’t find them, they make them.” - George Bernard Shaw
Your problems, your social media won’t run away but your precious time surely will. So live in the present and make your present beautiful, meaningful and worth remembering.
My dear friend, please don’t be hard on yourself and don’t ever harm yourself. It’s okay! Forgive yourself and accept everything and moreover love yourself. Your journey of self-healing will make you a stronger and happier person than you ever were.
I’m so proud of you!
What did you feel after reading this letter?